I’m on the trans spectrum, for what it’s worth, and don’t know any trans people who are okay with it as a verb, so I sort of feel like that trumps dictionaries?

Yes, I agree.

I also like your analysis of the difference in usage and meaning. That articulates much more saliently what I felt was going on when I mentioned the analogy there wasn’t exact enough.

“Misgendered” refers to how people are gendering (that is, assigning a gender to) someone. Being transgender is a descriptor of oneself, and though some of those sort of terms (red-haired, left-handed) can comfortably be -ed, “transgendered” makes it sound like a thing one did, as opposed to a constant state.

In short, thanks.

It’s worth noting that.

I keep getting mixed information on it, and it’s actually not clear. For example, the American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language disagrees with you. Miriam Webster also recognizes the variant. Given that “gendered” is the adjective of the noun “gender,” grammatically one might say (or assume) it should be “transgendered,” if we place the rules of grammar above linguistic convention, but convention is really the final authority, especially as even the grammar is unclear (e.g. “misgendered” is an actual verb, and a participle, but “transgendered” isn’t employed in the same way, so the analogy is imperfect).

So what to do. I think this article is worth heeding, and we should just defy English grammar and treat “transgender” as an adjective (even though “gender” is not an adjective), as long as that’s how people so-identifying are using it.

Hence, fixed.

(One small quibble: “transgender” is not a verb, it’s an adjective, so “transgendered” is not appropriate, “transgender” is.)